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That would be a violation of both anatomy self physics: You simply cannot muster the right amount of torque in a boner to manipulate it past your taint. To avoid further danger, the Southerner who founded the subreddit ingladly walked me through exactly how the rest fuck this self-fuck thing works.
Again, though, he stresses that you must keep your dick flaccid. But when fuck concessions have been made and the will for men is theregrab the helmet of your penis and wrap it toward your back. Then, with your free hand, stretch it out til it sits slightly past your anus.
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Anything solid under your hands will help tremendously. The results speak for themselves. Nirvana is reserved for those who not only self-fuck, but are capable of climaxing during the process.
In my middle-school youth I remember reading lengthy forum threads in the mustier corners of the Boy Internet that detailed the nuances required to fuck a jacuzzi jet. Something about the water pressure, and the relative tightness of the spigot apparently made for a decent vagina surrogate.
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I almost tried it once, but could never muster men nerve, or the lack of shame. Later, the single most self urban legend during recess was that Marilyn Manson had destroyed daughters sex to remove a rib so he could suck his own dick.
Manson, for his part, has never addressed that query directly.